Ghost of a Gardener | Lyrics

TIME
time - I've forgiven you, time
you were salt in my hand
so I threw you over my left shoulder

you landed, you landed on good soil
a few plants they died
but the heartier ones they survived

time - I’ve forgiven you, time
no I won't speak ill
when you're dead in the ground and I'm alive

see I, what I've got to show
is a home and a husband
and a cat who we can't hold

still all I want is my mother
all I want is my mother

oh these holy waters
oh this hallow time
oh this fallen empire
is only in my mind

so I - I won't give you anymore time
coz the next the thing I know
I'll be dead to the fact that I'm alive

so you - you can look me in the eye
and you see that I've won
this time, this time, this time

so all I ask is for my mother
to know that she is good
you know I’d give it to her if I was able
but I was born with the same hollow

all I want is my mother
to know that she is good
all I want is my mother
Rachel: piano, vocals
David: acoustic guitar, MS-20, percussion
Ari: upright bass, vocals
Evan: drums, percussion
Cole: trumpet
Alec: bass clarinet
Alisa: violin
Dina: viola
Jess: cello


WORDS
the words used to be alive in my mouth
trying to find a way out
strange how it was -
I could never make them stay
or go away
willful were they
and caught in their clutch was I

unholy the days when I stood
in their wake
loneliest of hours
but joyful and mad
when they made it back
to alight on my loosened tongue
willful were they
and caught in their clutch was I
willful were they
and sold by their sound was I

now two years gone and for all I long
the flock doesn’t come around
but watchful I wait
by my window and pray -
wing your way back to me
but still is the sky
and quiet the time flies
still is the sky
and quiet this life flies

but I won’t be alarmed
I won’t be afraid
if I listen just right
I’ll find another way
I won’t be alarmed
I won’t be afraid
if I listen just right
I’ll find something to say…
Rachel: piano, vocals
David: electric guitar, vocals
Ari: upright bass, vocals
Evan: drums, percussion
Kristin: vocals
Cole: trumpet
Alec: flute
Devon, Raina, Carrie, Danny: choir


GHOST
I’ll return time and again
to the door we entered in
no regrets, Mr. Dissident
I see so now I know
I see so now I know

I’m a ghost, I’m a gardener
I’m lost in the room
I am lost with you, I’m lost
I’m a ghost of a gardener
my rows of thistle bloom
I pick them for you

quiet now, let’s go to rest
on the bed of lilies I planted
of course they didn’t take
but a fine bed they’ll make
my dreams full of dirt & you
my dreams of dirt and you

I’m a ghost of a gardener
and my rows of thistle bloom
I pick them for you
I pick them for you

someday when my eyes are clouded white
I’ll see this clear
I will see this clear

and when my hands are gnarled and tired
I’ll lift this up
I will lift this up

and then when my body’s
gone gone gone
I’ll become the ground
I will become the ground

and the lilies, they’ll be blooming
and the garden, a belly-full
and the willow, bent for weeping
and I’ll see this done
I will see this done

Rachel: vocals, electric guitar, piano, organ
David: electric bass
Evan: drums
Emmett: lead guitar
Ari & Kristin: vocals
Alisa: violin
Dina: viola
Jess: cello
HOLIEST DAY
I drove away
far from the lake
I found the farmer’s daughter
we could’ve been sisters if I were humble
clothes muddy, red cheeked and reticent
I looked around
and wished that I could stay
and cover my head
I’d keep the fire going
and I’d tuck the kids all into bed
see, I know all the hymns
I’d say my prayers and close my eyes
to wake and dawn
and do it all over again
so half in jest I asked if I could stay
and help milk the cows
Annie looked away
she said - Just come back in an hour.

asking for more, we ask
we ask for more
always for more, we ask
we ask for more

so I drove away
back to the lake
back to all my pretty, my precious things
I put the milk away
and I started to cry
I put the music on to fill the quiet
oh this cluttered life -
we try we try we try we try we try

asking for more, we ask
we ask for more
always for more, we ask
we ask for more

holiest day
break our nightmares in two
holiest day
shape our nightmares into threes
holiest day
take our nightmares before we wake

we ask, we ask

Rachel: vocals, electric guitar, mellotron, piano, glockenspiel
Ari: upright bass, vocals
Evan: drums
Kristin: vocals
Alisa: violin
Jess: cello


WHERE I STAND
you can not be here
and I will not remain
so as we are to part
I beg you - take stock of your heart

your shadow’s on my trail
a holy ghostly pale
just do what you will do
but let me know where I stand
with or without you

I’ll run faster than laughter
while you can look past her
and see that I’ve gone again
Chicago looms large in my vision
this insular mission
to see this thing through
with or without you

earth and sky prevail as you fall
but soon I know you’ll rise
and reach out to where I stand
with or without you

Rachel: vocals, piano, organ
David: electric bass
Emmett: lead guitar
Cole: trumpet
MERCY
thank you for the pictures you sent
the clouds were marveling
I don’t know what you meant by them
but I will give you anything

when the prairie freezes over
I’ll be gone again
to the east where there’s no grassland
to dance with the wind
to the east where the asphalt
shivers under the wind
there are prayers that I utter in waking
and don’t even know the words

when the prairie freezes over
you’ll be breaking down
your best intention
strewn on the shoulder
hitch a lift back to town

my remorse is useless - and I know
but here it is again
you stay sober
and I’ll come over with a bottle of gin
you stay sober and I’ll come over
with a bottle of gin

god have mercy and let us be married
and never drink again
god as my witness and you as my kin
I’ll never drink again

Rachel: vocals
David: acoustic guitar, percussion, vocals
Ari: upright bass, vocals
Evan: drums, percussion
Emmett: lead guitar
Cole: trumpet
WILLOW
I don’t wanna say sorry
for all the things I haven’t done
I just want to go back
to the way things were always done

with a hand held out to shake
and a word unbreakable
and a gaze
straight as the miles that cut the dirt

grandma I wanna go back
to the way things were always done
when you’d come down
to find your man
working the ground

with his hand held to the plow
and his back unbreakable
and his word as good as the gold
they found in those hills

but I’m not gonna go
I’m not gonna go
back to the word I never knew

so tell me all your stories
about the way things were always done
back before you knew me
and the world it maybe seemed young

before your hands shook so much
and your voice so breakable
and your back bent
lower than the willow by the woods

my handshake don’t mean enough
and my word is breakable
and my back feels bent
lower than the willow by the woods
than the willow

Rachel: vocals, electric guitar
Ari: upright bass, vocals
Evan: drums
Emmett: lead guitar
Alisa: violin
Dina: viola
Jess: cello


YOU CAN GO
did they say where's your bible?
where's the body and the blood?
or did you think
you could go out in the world
with no light from above?

did they say where's your mother?
and what is she to you?
did you really think
you could go out in the world
with no guidance from her?

i'm sorry
i'm sorry for you
i'm sorry it had to come to this so soon

did they say where's your family?
the ones you're too scared to know
or did you really think
you could go out in the world
just pretending you're alone?

did they say where's your spirit?
she must be screaming bloody murder
or did you think
you could go out in the world
without listening to her?

i'm sorry
i'm sorry for you
i'm sorry it had to come to this so soon

you can go now
you can leave this all behind
you can go now
you can leave this all behind

who you waiting for?
who you waiting for?

Rachel: vocals, electric guitar
David: vocals
Ari: upright bass, vocals
Evan: drums
Emmett: lead guitar
Kristin: vocals


I SEE IT COMING
when I was lonely
when I was nine
I had these dreams
where everybody died
some are too awful
for me to retell
but one burned a brand
in my skull
I saw it coming
out in the country
in the church parking lot
just a kid kicking gravel
while the others milled about
then I saw it coming -
burning the fields
a wall of lava smoking our heels
so I tried to tell them -
Look up to the western sky!
Don’t you feel the heat rising?
Our world is on fire!
waving my little arms
and stamping the ground
flailing the truth from out my mouth
but nobody listened
they all turned away
walked into the church
walked into their graves
walked into the church
and into their graves
while I watched it coming
I watched it coming
well each day I’d wake up
smelling the burn
scorched in my loneliness
feeling forever unheard
but now I’m never lonely
and you’re listening, too
but still I’ve these dreams
I see are coming true
yeah I see it coming
I see it coming
I see it coming
Rachel: vocals, electric guitars, organ
David: Moog Opus 3, Degan bells
Evan: drums
Kristin: vocals
Alec: flute
STANDING STILL
I’ll wait for you in Iowa
in the house upon the hill
yesterday tornadoes came
but here I’m standing still
here I’m standing still

I know these past few days have been
the hardest that we've had
last night we nearly lost it all
but here we're standing still
here we're standing still
I would give it all
I'd give it all to you
if only I knew
what it is I've got for you
what I've got to give you
what it is I've got for you
on the day that we pass on into -
nobody knows
may we leave a memory
of us after the storm
ever standing still
here we're standing still
here we’re standing still
here we’re standing still
Rachel: vocals, pump organ, piano, Juno
David: mellotron, drums
Gregory: vocals